Siege Diaries 7/11/2020

And finally, the last day of SMASH entries….

#71 – Find out 5 facts about pre-17th century leader from world history that you didn’t know, and post them here.

Five fun facts about Ivan the Terrible (aka Ivan IV, first Tsar of all the Russias:
1. His father was known as Vasilii the Adequate
2. His first son, Dmitri, was drowned in a boating accident at the age of 8 months
3. Both his mother and his first wife were likely poisoned (not by him)
4. He died of a stroke while playing chess..
5. Moscow burned to the ground twice during his reign.

#77 – Write a poem or story in a period style glorifying something totally mundane, like washing dishes, or walking your dog. Cut and paste the poem here. Include the name and period of the style you use. Keep it under a page, please (I’m looking at you, Norse Saga-ists).

For Him Who Changes The Kitty Litter.

In the morn, with stench increasing
And sands foul’d with damp unceasing
Turds buried deep by dainty paws
And feline glares with threat of claws
No time to stay in bed of leisure
He sifts the litter, extracts treasure
In solid clumps, and holds his nose
And pours new sand, in cramped pose
From weighty box, the “scented” brand
For multiple cats, with firm hand
Without complaint, fuzzbutts serving
Of great praise he is deserving.

#79 – Tell a “no sh!t, there I was…” story, but it has to be true, and it has to be yours. Either text or video.

No sh*t, there I was, at Pennsic XXXII. I had moved back to Ealdormere earlier in the year after living in the Middle Kingdom for three years,although I was still working at my old job and commuting down to Ohio for one week a month. I was camped in the Ealdormere Populace encampment, and people kept asking me “have you really moved back?” Which I thought was a little weird, but hey. Ealdormere Court was on the final Thursday, and I had been shooting in the Archer Champs that afternoon. I barely made it to Court in my rather sweaty purple tunic. There’s an awful lot of my co-workers from the Pennsic Independent there, but we often go to each other’s courts, so whatever.

In walk King Pieter and Queen Nan of the Middle Kingdom–and they’re there to beg a boon of King Edouard and Queen Eanor that I be elevated to the Order of the Pelican. To say I was gobsmacked is a vast understatement. Apparently, the recommendation to elevate me had been made in the Middle the previous January–right about the time I had moved. So emissaries were sent to the Ealdormerian Order of the Pelican at Pennsic to find out whether the Middle could still elevate me, and TRM Ealdormere said, “No, we want to do her.” So a compromise was worked out. Pieter told me recently that as far as he knows, this was the only instance of sitting Royalty begging a boon for someone in another Kingdom’s Court. (I was elevated a month and a half later in my home canton of Eoforwic, at an event held in a (sorta-real) castle.)

#87 – Do a diagram of a battle using candy or cookies (photo)

Battle on the Ice (Battle of Lake Peipus).  Goldfish represent the Teutonic Knights and the wine gums are Alexander Nevsky’s forces.

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#89 – blazon your dinner – take a photo of dinner, post with blazon|

Azure semy of baby carrots proper, a chicken breast argent


We’re still waiting on the final results of the competition.  But it was a ton of fun, and I’d participate again in a second.