Siege Diaries 5/13/2021

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Today’s Daily Stoic writing prompt: Which bad habits am I fueling?

Well, I decided yesterday would be a great time to start tracking my food again.  So there’s one I’m paying attention to again.

But my biggest issue right now is probably around procrastination–that tendency I have to sometimes put off work that needs to be done until the deadline is looming, and then I end up doing a half-assed job of it (which is still pretty good, because often my half-assed is good enough–but I know it could be so much better).  The problem is that in Pandemic World, I sometimes cannot be arsed to give one of my precious f*cks.  I’d rather spend them on things that matter more deeply to me personally.  But then I end up angry at myself for self-sabotage.  I know this, I recognize the cycle, but I have so few things right now to look forward to, my motivation for getting through a week is extremely low.  And yes, I know that in the abstract I may have things to look forward to — I mean, the US today announced that vaccinated people can stop wearing masks indoors in locations outside of their houses–but I’m sorry, but that’s only a thing to look forward to in the vague future, not on any particular date.  And we’re still not out of this yet by any means, even if 42% of people in Canada have had their first shot.  Our stay-at-home order was extended again today.

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Today’s big news was the shutdown of Greyhound.  It wasn’t unexpected, given that they had ceased all service during the pandemic a year ago, but it’s sad nonetheless, especially given how much remote communities depend on less high-tech modes of transit like buses.  This is one area where I have to cast aspersions on all levels of government–when the pandemic finally wanes, the lack of this service is going to be deeply felt, and I think much more could have been done to try to provide a lifeline through this period to companies like this who serve less privileged populations.  This particular news also impacts someone close to me, so it was especially sad to hear.

On the positive side, I enjoyed a nice embroidery hangout this evening.  The cross stitch project is nearing completion (I could probably push through and finish it this evening, but I’m getting tired), and I’m starting to map out the Pallas’ cat project by turning the photo into a line drawing.  On the negative side, I spent time trying to get iPhones to play nice, which I eventually sort of figured out but didn’t get the usual pleasure I take in solving tech mysteries.

I’m definitely ready for the weekend.

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