Siege Diaries 5/16/2021

Today’s Daily Stoic writing prompt:  How am I creating momentum for my good habits?

I committed last October to go through a full year writing these updates based on the Daily Stoic journal, and I’ve kept that commitment.  Recently, WordPress has been telling me “you have a 210-day streak (or whatever it is)” of posting to this blog.  There have been a couple of days where I was tired, or busy with other things, and I still kept the streak going.   Am I going to continue it come October, when my year is up?  Not likely;  it will have served its purpose, but then again, I might find some other set of daily prompts to write for.  (Actually, that sounds rather appealing!)

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I ran across a reference to “Body Neutrality” in a recent FB post, and decided to follow up on it.  This article  discusses the concept, which is an alternative to “body positivity”.  It’s a concept that it seems I have been more or less following for years.  I don’t love my body.  I don’t hate it, either.  It just is.  It’s me.    Part of it is that I’ve never seen “being attractive”–as in the emphasis on the physical appearance as the primary attribute that determines one’s worth–as a goal I wanted to strive for, or believed would make me somehow a better person.  I have always wanted, mostly, to be who I am.    This goes right in with the realization from earlier in the year that I’m agender.  I can guarantee 100% that anything I do with my body–from my hair colour to my weight to exercise to the clothes I put on it–I do primarily because it makes me feel good.  Even clothing–while I definitely enjoy attractive clothing, my enjoyment is over the style or colour or fabric–not in whether it “improves” me in some way.  I don’t need to be “seen” –at least not by random strangers or acquaintances.  Friends, I would hope, would see me for other things.

While perhaps I do have a neutral attitude towards my body, I definitely have a pragmatic positivity towards what I would call, for lack of a better word, my soul.  This is something I want to work to improve, always, and I care about how it impacts others and the world around me.  The impact of a beautiful body is short, and limited in its effects.  The impact of a beautiful soul can be long-lasting and wide-ranging.

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I put together the documentation for my Bardic War scribal entry today and proofed two chapters of the CWH book.  Both RPG games took place today, which was nice to return to after a week off. I’ve also started stitching the Pallas’ cat.   I really do enjoy stitching cats–thread lends itself very well to being able to create variegation and texture.

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I have Friday booked off this week.  I expect this week may be relatively quiet, although that may depend on where we are with a deployment scheduled for next weekend.  Just in time for several days of nice weather that should allow for some good lunchtime walks.